When watching Kimi Ni Todoke yesterday(obviously since I reblogged so many pictures from it LOL), I teared up at a part where Sawako said that she finally was happy knowing that people weren’t annoyed at her and liked her.

I didn’t tear up because it was sad or happy. I mean, it was happy, but that wasn’t the reason.

My rant yesterday about my friend asking me if I ever stopped talking meant more than just a friend telling me to stop talking too much.

Moving to a new school, I’ve hesitated making new friends. It’s difficult trying to determine if they actually like you or not. 

The girl I ranted about yesterday was the one who told me honestly about how a group of girls(who were literally the first girls to approach me in freshman year; my first friends at my school) felt about me. I would say the whole story again but it’d be easier to refer to this: http://nintendovii.tumblr.com/post/12588314939/its-pretty-upsetting-to-find-out-how-people

The friend who told me of those girls was the same girl who said that statement above. I was starting to believe that she was one of the only girls at school to actually attempt to talk to me, that she wanted to be my friend.

She’s going through the same pattern my former friends are. She’s starting to see my flaws. She’s noticed them before but they’re becoming more obvious to her. She says she doesn’t mind me at first but now I’m starting to bother her. 

I can’t keep friends at this school, I swear. 

So overall, the whole reason I teared up was that I wished I was able to have people from my school attempt to be my friends and not find me annoying later on. The relationship Sawako has with Chizu and Ayane, although fictional, makes me jealous. 

I’m left with awkward acquaintances at my current school and good friends that I rarely get to meet from another. 

It gets lonely at times; I’m not going to lie.